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gtrman1976 Profile
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Attention Musicians and Drummers!!


 emoticon

How many drummers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

answer:

None-They have a machine that does that [sign in to see URL]
8/22/2003, 6:49 am Link to this post Send Email to gtrman1976   Send PM to gtrman1976
 
NickMinnion Profile
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posticon Re: Attention Musicians and Drummers!!


These were mailed to me by Mike Maley:


 
How many guitarists does it take to change a light bulb?
 
four: 1 to change it and the other three to stand there with their arms folded and say "I can do that, you know"

 
How do you get 2 drummers to play in time?
 
Shoot one of 'em.

 
What's the range of a fretless bass?
 
25 yards if you've got a good arm.

 
Did you hear the one about the intelligent drummer?
 
No? neither did I.

 
Did you hear about the bass player who locked his keys in the car?
 
It took him an hour to get the drummer out.

 
and just to show that i am not drummer biased:
 
what's the difference between a coffin and a keyboard?
 
the coffin is the one with the corpse on the inside.

Thanks Mike
 emoticon
10/16/2003, 11:02 pm Link to this post Send Email to NickMinnion   Send PM to NickMinnion
 
Fife Profile
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Re: Attention Musicians and Drummers!!


O.K.,

These are good ones so far. Here are a few general musician jokes:

What's the difference between a Saving's Bond and a Musician? The Saving's Bond eventually matures and starts earning money. (oouch!)

What's the difference between a banjo player and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family of four.

One day a mother says to her son, "Johnny, what do you want to be when you grow up?" the boy replies, "I want to be a professional musician." to which the mother replies, "Now Johnny, you can't be both."

One day lady walks into a doctor's office and complains that her son cannot speak a word. The doctor examines the boy and instructs her to bring him in the next day for a follow-up appointment. The next day the lady brings her son back into the doctor's office. The doctor takes them into a back room where he has a Jazz band setup at one end of the room. He places the boy in a chair and instructs the band to begin playing. As the song progresses the bass player begins to take a solo. All of a sudden the boy begins speaking out loud, describing the room and the music with much enthusiasm. The boy goes on and on without stopping to take a breath. The lady is amazed! She asks the doctor, "How did you know that this would cure his speach problem?" The doctor answers, "Everyone talks during the bass solo."

-- Fife
10/19/2003, 7:37 pm Link to this post Send Email to Fife   Send PM to Fife
 
smokinbobby Profile
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Re: Attention Musicians and Drummers!!


How do you know when there's a drummer at the door?

the knocking speeds up....
1/8/2004, 11:03 am Link to this post Send Email to smokinbobby   Send PM to smokinbobby
 
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Re: Attention Musicians and Drummers!!


whats the differnce between the James Last Orchestra,and a bull?

with the James Last Orchestra,the arsehole is at the front and the horns are at the back
1/8/2004, 11:05 am Link to this post Send Email to smokinbobby   Send PM to smokinbobby
 
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Re: Attention Musicians and Drummers!!


how do you know when theres a drummer at the door?

the pizza has arrived
1/8/2004, 11:07 am Link to this post Send Email to smokinbobby   Send PM to smokinbobby
 
Scream1986 Profile
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Re: Attention Musicians and Drummers!!


Lol.

---
Boo!
8/25/2005, 12:11 pm Link to this post Send Email to Scream1986   Send PM to Scream1986
 
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Re: Attention Musicians and Drummers!!


A man goes into a shop and says:
'I'd like to but a guitar please'
Man in the shop says:
'You're a drummer arent you?'
Man says 'yes' 'how did you know?'

Man in shop says......

'This is a Butchers shop!!'


What do you call a person who hangs around with musicians?
A drummer

Whats the difference between a drummer and a drum machine?
You only need to punch the information in once on a drum machine!

Oldies but goodies!!
3/16/2007, 8:00 pm Link to this post Send Email to OxfordshireUK   Send PM to OxfordshireUK
 
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Re: Attention Musicians and Drummers!!


first joke should be 'buy' a guitar!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! emoticon
3/16/2007, 8:02 pm Link to this post Send Email to OxfordshireUK   Send PM to OxfordshireUK
 
doublehumbucker Profile
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Beethoven


What's big and brown and sits on a piano?

Beethoven's Last Movement. emoticon
10/8/2007, 6:41 am Link to this post Send Email to doublehumbucker   Send PM to doublehumbucker
 


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